Monday, November 19, 2007

An equal and opposite reaction

We told our families about the twins. We had debated waiting until about 12 weeks (right around Christmas) as we did with KB, but then we caved. After all, how many times in life will we get to say, "We're pregnant with twins"? It has a much better ring to it than "Well, we were pregnant with twins, but now..."

Moving on. We limited the news to immediate family, which meant my parents & sister, S's parents, sister/BIL, brother/SIL. I am not close enough to my brother at this point in my life that I was going to call him up at 11 pm to share the news. I figure my mom will tell him and my SIL at Thanksgiving anyway.

S's family was universally thrilled. "Wonderful!" "Great news!" "Fantastic!" and "Congratulations!" are just a few of the exclamations I remember. My MIL and S's sister both added, "So, trying to keep up with your big brother?"

My family, on the other hand, seemed less than thrilled. My sister asked with a flat voice, "Are you kidding me?" She told me I should go ahead and reserve my spot at the looney bin now. She also (helpfully) added, "I hope you're not like me and got your easy kid first." While she is correct that if KB ends up being my 'easy' kid, then I am in a shitload of trouble, she could have saved the sentiment for another time.

My mother was equally unenthusiastic. Her immediate reply was "WHAT?! Are you kidding me?!" When I told her that the doctor warned us that there was a 40-50% chance of the twins reducing to a singleton, she replied, "Wow, I almost don't know..." and her voice trailed off. "Which outcome to root for?" I prompted. Yeah, pretty much. She eventually decided she would just "pray for the outcome that was meant to be."

The next morning, Mom told Dad. He had been asleep when I called. When she indicated that there might be someone new for him to meet next summer, he replied, "They're having ANOTHER one?" When Mom replied that it looked like twins, he said "Holy shit!"

So. I'm sad that my family didn't respond in the same way that S's family did. But I'm also deeply curious why they didn't. Do they think I'm too old to have another child? Do they think KB is that much of a handful that I can't handle another? Are they just stunned at the prospect of twins?

Or is it that I've been a little too forthcoming with my mom and sister about how little S does around here, and they are worried that adding twins to the mix is going to push me over the edge?

I'm really, really curious. But I'm not sure I'm ready to ask yet.

2 comments:

pithydithy said...

I remember when I called my mom to tell her that Mr. Pithy and I were engaged and she just said "oh." No enthusiasm. No nothing. It was so disappointing to me to want to share some joy and to be surprised instead by her ambivalent response. I never found out why that response. I don't know if I want to know, to tell you the truth. But she did eventually perk up.

Whatever your family's reasons, they're not yours. I hope that they'll come around and, in the meantime, I hope you know that there are us internet folks who are also thrilled for your news and who know just what to hope for!

Maryam said...

When I was pregnant with Lucas and told my mother, I got a "No, I don't believe you". MIL didn't do much better with her reaction. She started talking about a romantic date she had with her then boyfriend.

Who knows what their reasonings are. Who really wants to know. Just enjoy your sleep right now.