Oooh, Karen at The Naked Ovary is having naming issues too.
One of her commenters suggested this retort for people who poo-poo the parents' choice of name for baby:
You got to name your children, I get to name mine.
I love it. I think I'll try it next time someone gives us grief about baby names.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
My mother on breastfeeding
Mom: Are you going to try nursing again this time?
Me: Yes, I'd really like to give it my best shot.
Mom: But this time, I'm guessing you're going to be a lot more willing to supplement right away if things don't work out?
Me: Well, I'd really like breastfeeding to work this time. I'll work with the lactation consultant at the hospital from the beginning, and if she can't help me, I'll find another one.
Mom: But last time, you were feeding KB every 2 hours, and you were trying for 45 minutes at a time, and he still wasn't gaining weight, and you weren't sleeping, and you were so tired and so frustrated. It was just awful.
**************************************
This is the second time my mother has instigated the "But you're going to just give formula if breastfeeding doesn't work immediately, right?" conversation.
Do I really need to tell you that my mother did not give any of us 3 kids a single drop of breast milk?
I am starting to regret my decision to have my mom here for the first 3 weeks. I need support, not someone telling me at every turn to give up and just give formula because "it's easier".
Me: Yes, I'd really like to give it my best shot.
Mom: But this time, I'm guessing you're going to be a lot more willing to supplement right away if things don't work out?
Me: Well, I'd really like breastfeeding to work this time. I'll work with the lactation consultant at the hospital from the beginning, and if she can't help me, I'll find another one.
Mom: But last time, you were feeding KB every 2 hours, and you were trying for 45 minutes at a time, and he still wasn't gaining weight, and you weren't sleeping, and you were so tired and so frustrated. It was just awful.
**************************************
This is the second time my mother has instigated the "But you're going to just give formula if breastfeeding doesn't work immediately, right?" conversation.
Do I really need to tell you that my mother did not give any of us 3 kids a single drop of breast milk?
I am starting to regret my decision to have my mom here for the first 3 weeks. I need support, not someone telling me at every turn to give up and just give formula because "it's easier".
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
What's in a name?
We are still trying to decide on a name for the baby. With KB, our choice was very easy. Honestly, we had chosen his name a couple of weeks after we got married, way back in 1999, and we never wavered from that choice. It was the perfect name for him.
We chose his name because we wanted something that would reflect both of our heritages, Indian and Irish (I am 1/4 Irish from my mom's side, 1/4 Lithuanian from my mom's side, and a mixture of English, Irish, German, Scottish, and possibly Welsh on my dad's side).
Shortly before we married, we watched an excellent movie called "This is My Father". We loved the name shared by the father & son main characters. As it turned out, the name (minus one letter) was also an Indian name. We loved (and still love) the name.
With baby #2, however, we have not had a name jump out at us. We again played around with the Irish/Indian names, and came up with this short list:
Sean/Shaan
Rowan/Rohan
Devon/Devan
Thomas/Tamas
Colin/Kalan
Neil/Neal/Neel
But seemingly, we find a strike against each of the Indian names. Some have a negative connotation (Shaan, for example, means "pride" and Tamas means "darkness"). Kalan is apparently the Indian equivalent of a "country bumpkin" name. S doesn't like Devan for whatever reason. And personally, I think Neel and Rohan are way too common.
I've gone through lists of Indian baby names multiple times, and I've decided I like the name
Ketan
It rhymes with "Nathan", though the "th" sound is much softer, barely there, in Ketan.
S likes it as well. KB loves it, and has been referring to the baby by that name since we started kicking it around a couple of months ago.
But no one else in either of our families seems to care for it. Everyone keeps asking us if we've settled on a name yet, despite our telling them that Ketan is the current front-runner.
A big drawback to the name Ketan is that it's probably going to be mis-pronounced as "Keaton" or "Kay-TAHN" by non-Indians.
After Ketan, Sean is the #2 name on our list.
I would like Thomas as the middle name, because it means "twin", and in my own small way, I want to remember and to honor the fact that this baby started his journey with a twin sibling.
So, opinions please. I've set up a poll, but feel free to add comments. And if you can think of an Irish/Indian name pair that we haven't thought of, please feel free to tell me.
We chose his name because we wanted something that would reflect both of our heritages, Indian and Irish (I am 1/4 Irish from my mom's side, 1/4 Lithuanian from my mom's side, and a mixture of English, Irish, German, Scottish, and possibly Welsh on my dad's side).
Shortly before we married, we watched an excellent movie called "This is My Father". We loved the name shared by the father & son main characters. As it turned out, the name (minus one letter) was also an Indian name. We loved (and still love) the name.
With baby #2, however, we have not had a name jump out at us. We again played around with the Irish/Indian names, and came up with this short list:
Sean/Shaan
Rowan/Rohan
Devon/Devan
Thomas/Tamas
Colin/Kalan
Neil/Neal/Neel
But seemingly, we find a strike against each of the Indian names. Some have a negative connotation (Shaan, for example, means "pride" and Tamas means "darkness"). Kalan is apparently the Indian equivalent of a "country bumpkin" name. S doesn't like Devan for whatever reason. And personally, I think Neel and Rohan are way too common.
I've gone through lists of Indian baby names multiple times, and I've decided I like the name
Ketan
It rhymes with "Nathan", though the "th" sound is much softer, barely there, in Ketan.
S likes it as well. KB loves it, and has been referring to the baby by that name since we started kicking it around a couple of months ago.
But no one else in either of our families seems to care for it. Everyone keeps asking us if we've settled on a name yet, despite our telling them that Ketan is the current front-runner.
A big drawback to the name Ketan is that it's probably going to be mis-pronounced as "Keaton" or "Kay-TAHN" by non-Indians.
After Ketan, Sean is the #2 name on our list.
I would like Thomas as the middle name, because it means "twin", and in my own small way, I want to remember and to honor the fact that this baby started his journey with a twin sibling.
So, opinions please. I've set up a poll, but feel free to add comments. And if you can think of an Irish/Indian name pair that we haven't thought of, please feel free to tell me.
We have a date
At my last appointment (3 weeks ago, at 28 weeks), I told my physician's assistant that I had a date in mind for my scheduled c-section. She said that the woman who handles the surgery schedule only works Tuesdays and Thursdays, so she'd make a note in my chart and the scheduler would call me the next day.
The scheduler did indeed call, and proceeded to tell me that the date I had chosen would not work because my ob-gyn was going to be on vacation all that week. Keep in mind that my ob-gyn has been telling me since Day 1 that she would schedule my c-section for approximately one week before my due date.
The scheduler continued, "How about July 7th?" I told her that's the one date I'd like to avoid, seeing as it's KB's birthday and all. She replied that I needed to talk to my ob-gyn to figure out logistics, so she changed my 31 week appointment to be with Dr. G instead of with my fave physician's assistant.
I figured my choices were (a) schedule the c-section for the date I wanted, to be performed by the other ob-gyn in the practice, or (b) wait for my ob-gyn to get back from vacation.
Had my 31 week appointment this morning and talked with Dr. G about scheduling. She doesn't want to take a chance on my going into labor on my own, so she wants to do the c-section earlier rather than later. She said her vacation plans are still not set in stone, so she will most likely work the Monday and/or Tuesday of July 4th week.
This means my c-section is tentatively scheduled for July 1st (the date we wanted originally). If by chance Dr. G decides to go on vacation then, she will push the date back to June 30.
Oy. I am soooooo not ready. And by that I mean mentally, physically, emotionally.
The only thing I have accomplished thus far is to wash one load of baby clothes. That's it.
Sheets, towels, washcloths: unwashed.
Nursery? Still has two desks, two bookshelves, filing crates, and lots of miscellaneous papers (not to mention all my craft supplies in the closet).
KB's big boy room? Needs all the furniture moved out, needs to be primed & painted, needs to have his big boy furniture brought in from the garage and assembled. Oh, and a mattress for his new bed would be nice.
I am just under 8 weeks until the big day and I have no idea how I'm going to get anything done. No energy, no motivation.
I keep telling myself it's OK if I just get the co-sleeper, Pack n Play, and changing table set up by the time the baby comes. But S is getting really twitchy about wanting the office to be converted to the nursery.
The scheduler did indeed call, and proceeded to tell me that the date I had chosen would not work because my ob-gyn was going to be on vacation all that week. Keep in mind that my ob-gyn has been telling me since Day 1 that she would schedule my c-section for approximately one week before my due date.
The scheduler continued, "How about July 7th?" I told her that's the one date I'd like to avoid, seeing as it's KB's birthday and all. She replied that I needed to talk to my ob-gyn to figure out logistics, so she changed my 31 week appointment to be with Dr. G instead of with my fave physician's assistant.
I figured my choices were (a) schedule the c-section for the date I wanted, to be performed by the other ob-gyn in the practice, or (b) wait for my ob-gyn to get back from vacation.
Had my 31 week appointment this morning and talked with Dr. G about scheduling. She doesn't want to take a chance on my going into labor on my own, so she wants to do the c-section earlier rather than later. She said her vacation plans are still not set in stone, so she will most likely work the Monday and/or Tuesday of July 4th week.
This means my c-section is tentatively scheduled for July 1st (the date we wanted originally). If by chance Dr. G decides to go on vacation then, she will push the date back to June 30.
Oy. I am soooooo not ready. And by that I mean mentally, physically, emotionally.
The only thing I have accomplished thus far is to wash one load of baby clothes. That's it.
Sheets, towels, washcloths: unwashed.
Nursery? Still has two desks, two bookshelves, filing crates, and lots of miscellaneous papers (not to mention all my craft supplies in the closet).
KB's big boy room? Needs all the furniture moved out, needs to be primed & painted, needs to have his big boy furniture brought in from the garage and assembled. Oh, and a mattress for his new bed would be nice.
I am just under 8 weeks until the big day and I have no idea how I'm going to get anything done. No energy, no motivation.
I keep telling myself it's OK if I just get the co-sleeper, Pack n Play, and changing table set up by the time the baby comes. But S is getting really twitchy about wanting the office to be converted to the nursery.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
The sleep, it sucketh
If, during my child-free days, you had told me that I would once have a child who refused to sleep, I would have scoffed. With my genes? My kid would LOVE to sleep -- are you kidding?
If, during KB's early months, you had told me that he would still not be sleeping through the night at almost 3 years old, I would have laughed nervously and prayed that you were wrong.
If, now, you were to tell me that I will not have a good night's sleep again for the next 20 years or so, I will give a resigned sigh and sadly agree with you.
KB has always, always been on the low end of the 'recommended' sleep times for newborns, infants, toddlers, and now preschoolers. And honestly, it does not seem to bother him. Occasionally he seems a little cranky, and I can chalk that up to his lack of sleep the night before. But for the most part, he survives, and thrives, on less sleep than what the sleep experts say he needs.
Certainly, he gets by on less sleep than *I* think he needs...or that I need, for that matter.
Probably the most frustrating thing about KB's sleep is how inconsistent it is from night to night.
There are nights he sleeps for 10 hours with nary a peep.
There are nights he almost sleeps through, but squidges here and there and puts himself back to sleep with no intervention on our parts.
There are nights he wakes up 5 times in an hour, asking for a drink of water, or covers, or to pee pee in the potty. Or all of the above.
Then there are the nights, like last night, that he cries and cries to come to our bed. And at this point, we are so beaten down, so exhausted, that we give in. And then, like last night, we all get an extremely crappy night's sleep.
Sometimes KB sleeps very restfully with us. Most times, not. Last night he thrashed about and kept waking up, rousing us in the process. At 5:30, he wanted to pee in the potty, then he wanted to go back to his own bed. For the next hour, he talked to himself in his bed. At 6:30, he decided he was ready to come back to our bed. But of course, he was done with sleeping by then.
At this point, I don't know what to do. Just suck it up, I guess. I don't see how sleep training or sleep coaching would work at this point. We need somebody who isn't running on empty to help us; we are too exhausted to follow through and to be consistent with any sleep training method. I need a Sleep Training Super-Nanny.
Many, many friends told me that I would get used to the fragmented sleep. I never have. It's been almost 3 years and I still can't get used to it.
S had been letting me sleep in many mornings, but the crappy sleep is starting to get to him too. This morning he mumbled that he feels like he needs to take a day off work just to catch up on sleep. I don't blame him. I feel the same way.
Please, just let #2 sleep. I honestly can't handle another bad sleeper.
If, during KB's early months, you had told me that he would still not be sleeping through the night at almost 3 years old, I would have laughed nervously and prayed that you were wrong.
If, now, you were to tell me that I will not have a good night's sleep again for the next 20 years or so, I will give a resigned sigh and sadly agree with you.
KB has always, always been on the low end of the 'recommended' sleep times for newborns, infants, toddlers, and now preschoolers. And honestly, it does not seem to bother him. Occasionally he seems a little cranky, and I can chalk that up to his lack of sleep the night before. But for the most part, he survives, and thrives, on less sleep than what the sleep experts say he needs.
Certainly, he gets by on less sleep than *I* think he needs...or that I need, for that matter.
Probably the most frustrating thing about KB's sleep is how inconsistent it is from night to night.
There are nights he sleeps for 10 hours with nary a peep.
There are nights he almost sleeps through, but squidges here and there and puts himself back to sleep with no intervention on our parts.
There are nights he wakes up 5 times in an hour, asking for a drink of water, or covers, or to pee pee in the potty. Or all of the above.
Then there are the nights, like last night, that he cries and cries to come to our bed. And at this point, we are so beaten down, so exhausted, that we give in. And then, like last night, we all get an extremely crappy night's sleep.
Sometimes KB sleeps very restfully with us. Most times, not. Last night he thrashed about and kept waking up, rousing us in the process. At 5:30, he wanted to pee in the potty, then he wanted to go back to his own bed. For the next hour, he talked to himself in his bed. At 6:30, he decided he was ready to come back to our bed. But of course, he was done with sleeping by then.
At this point, I don't know what to do. Just suck it up, I guess. I don't see how sleep training or sleep coaching would work at this point. We need somebody who isn't running on empty to help us; we are too exhausted to follow through and to be consistent with any sleep training method. I need a Sleep Training Super-Nanny.
Many, many friends told me that I would get used to the fragmented sleep. I never have. It's been almost 3 years and I still can't get used to it.
S had been letting me sleep in many mornings, but the crappy sleep is starting to get to him too. This morning he mumbled that he feels like he needs to take a day off work just to catch up on sleep. I don't blame him. I feel the same way.
Please, just let #2 sleep. I honestly can't handle another bad sleeper.
28 weeks!
Had my 28 week appointment yesterday. Yowza. 3rd trimester already?!
Glucose Tolerance Test: passed with flying colors. Said the nurse as she looked at my chart, "I've never seen a number this low!" Prompting me, of course, to freak out that it was TOO low. The physician's assistant reassured me that it just meant my body was very efficient. (Yeah, right!!)
Rho-Gam shot: administered.
C-section date: requested. The woman who handles the scheduling only works on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so she's supposed to call me today to tell me whether we are on for July 1st or if we need to choose another date.
I think the only test left is the Group B strep -- but that's many weeks away.
Next appointment is in 3 weeks. This pregnancy is truly flying by.
S made a comment this morning about a girl's name that would be easy to pronounce for us non-Indian folk. I asked him if this meant he was thinking about going for #3. No, he replied, to suggest to [his cousin] in case she has a girl this time.
So I'm pretty sure he wants to 'close the factory' after #2 is born. I am not going to ask Dr. G to tie my tubes after my c-section though. Just seems too...final.
Glucose Tolerance Test: passed with flying colors. Said the nurse as she looked at my chart, "I've never seen a number this low!" Prompting me, of course, to freak out that it was TOO low. The physician's assistant reassured me that it just meant my body was very efficient. (Yeah, right!!)
Rho-Gam shot: administered.
C-section date: requested. The woman who handles the scheduling only works on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so she's supposed to call me today to tell me whether we are on for July 1st or if we need to choose another date.
I think the only test left is the Group B strep -- but that's many weeks away.
Next appointment is in 3 weeks. This pregnancy is truly flying by.
S made a comment this morning about a girl's name that would be easy to pronounce for us non-Indian folk. I asked him if this meant he was thinking about going for #3. No, he replied, to suggest to [his cousin] in case she has a girl this time.
So I'm pretty sure he wants to 'close the factory' after #2 is born. I am not going to ask Dr. G to tie my tubes after my c-section though. Just seems too...final.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
My big boy
I've been home from SLC since March 31. It was a very quick (but VERY enjoyable) trip, and I wish I could have stayed longer. Well, I wish I had made an annual pilgrimage to the Family History Library in SLC before I had kids. Who knows when I'll get to go again...
KB was very cute when he & S picked me up from the airport. He gave me a huge, lingering hug and kept patting my shoulder telling me, "Thank you for coming back from Salt Lake City, Mommy! I'm so happy!"
The next morning, he woke up, put his hands on my face and told me again, "Thank you so much for coming back, Mommy!" I got a huge lump in my throat as I told him, "I'll ALWAYS come back, baby."
Somehow, potty training really clicked while I was away. Even before I left, KB had been really good about keeping his pull-ups dry throughout the day and had begun to accidentally poop in the potty sometimes when he was peeing.
While I was gone, though, he seemed to really get it. He actually started telling S when he needed to pee and poop in the potty.
The morning of April 2, as we were getting him ready for school, he announced, "I want to wear underwear." So we grabbed a pair of his dinosaur undies and let him wear them to school. We reminded him that he had to tell the teachers EVERY SINGLE TIME he needed to pee or to poop.
And he's done great so far! He's had one pee accident, when he got distracted by story time and forgot to tell someone he needed to go. And he's had one poop accident, when he didn't quite make it to the potty in time. But that's it!
He's even started staying drier at night. He told us this morning that he wants to wear underwear at night too, instead of diapers. We told him that if he keeps waking up dry in the mornings, we'll make the switch.
We've also transitioned his crib to the toddler bed. We initially took off the front of the crib and left it open, in "day bed" mode. But KB was feeling really insecure like that, and afraid he would fall off the bed. Interestingly, the big fear he expressed the first night was that monsters would be able to get him now that the side was gone from the crib.
The bed transition hasn't gone nearly as well as the potty training, I'm afraid. We went ahead and got a guard rail because KB was insistent that he needed "a side" on his bed.
We have two big issues now: 1) He doesn't want to stay in bed when we put him down for naptime or bedtime and 2) His nightwakings have gotten even worse than they were before. The night before last (my turn to be 'on'), he was up 5 times between 3:30 and 4:30. Oy.
Last night was S's turn to do night duty. He just brought KB into our bed at 4:30, and we all slept until 7:40. Glorious.
But it pisses me off that S is the one who wants KB to sleep in his crib all night, AND YET, he is the one who ends up taking the lazy route and bringing him into our bed.
Anyway. We probably should not have made the transition to a bed at the same time we made the transition to underwear. A little too much change all at once for KB's comfort level, I think.
Mostly, I just can't believe my baby is not a baby anymore. He's getting to be a big boy.
KB was very cute when he & S picked me up from the airport. He gave me a huge, lingering hug and kept patting my shoulder telling me, "Thank you for coming back from Salt Lake City, Mommy! I'm so happy!"
The next morning, he woke up, put his hands on my face and told me again, "Thank you so much for coming back, Mommy!" I got a huge lump in my throat as I told him, "I'll ALWAYS come back, baby."
Somehow, potty training really clicked while I was away. Even before I left, KB had been really good about keeping his pull-ups dry throughout the day and had begun to accidentally poop in the potty sometimes when he was peeing.
While I was gone, though, he seemed to really get it. He actually started telling S when he needed to pee and poop in the potty.
The morning of April 2, as we were getting him ready for school, he announced, "I want to wear underwear." So we grabbed a pair of his dinosaur undies and let him wear them to school. We reminded him that he had to tell the teachers EVERY SINGLE TIME he needed to pee or to poop.
And he's done great so far! He's had one pee accident, when he got distracted by story time and forgot to tell someone he needed to go. And he's had one poop accident, when he didn't quite make it to the potty in time. But that's it!
He's even started staying drier at night. He told us this morning that he wants to wear underwear at night too, instead of diapers. We told him that if he keeps waking up dry in the mornings, we'll make the switch.
We've also transitioned his crib to the toddler bed. We initially took off the front of the crib and left it open, in "day bed" mode. But KB was feeling really insecure like that, and afraid he would fall off the bed. Interestingly, the big fear he expressed the first night was that monsters would be able to get him now that the side was gone from the crib.
The bed transition hasn't gone nearly as well as the potty training, I'm afraid. We went ahead and got a guard rail because KB was insistent that he needed "a side" on his bed.
We have two big issues now: 1) He doesn't want to stay in bed when we put him down for naptime or bedtime and 2) His nightwakings have gotten even worse than they were before. The night before last (my turn to be 'on'), he was up 5 times between 3:30 and 4:30. Oy.
Last night was S's turn to do night duty. He just brought KB into our bed at 4:30, and we all slept until 7:40. Glorious.
But it pisses me off that S is the one who wants KB to sleep in his crib all night, AND YET, he is the one who ends up taking the lazy route and bringing him into our bed.
Anyway. We probably should not have made the transition to a bed at the same time we made the transition to underwear. A little too much change all at once for KB's comfort level, I think.
Mostly, I just can't believe my baby is not a baby anymore. He's getting to be a big boy.
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